Letter To A Client

During and after a Life Coaching Program I am always available to my clients via email. Often clients make use of this availability until they have settled into their ‘new’ lives.

The journey during and after a series of coaching sessions is adventurous. You sign up for life coaching because you want to make some changes in your life. You may be unhappy in a relationship, a place, at work or with yourself.

While implementing newly learnt stuff, doing exercises and making a start with new behaviour, things within and around you will begin to change. It is what you wanted, but while it is happening it may be uncomfortable and a little scary.

In changing times it is good to know that you can rely on getting support within a couple of hours. Help is always just an email away.
I recently answered a client with an email that I think may be helpful for more people. Please find it below.

Dear [your name],

[…] It is an art to surrender to What Is, in this present moment – to surrender to [your current activities]; to surrender to [g.e. the beauty of nature when you go for a walk]. Surrendering to What Is – to fully accept and also fully appreciate what is actually here, now, will allow for your system to open up, to relax, to feel positive, to be well. And in this well-being your energy will ‘vibrate’ on the same ‘frequency’ as the abundance you want to allow into your life. It’s like with a radio. You want to tune into a certain radio station. You have to make sure you turn the button to that frequency, otherwise you can’t receive that specific radio station. You have to make sure that you are feeling good already, to allow for all the other good stuff to flow into your awareness.

Could you welcome all your fear, all the anxiety, frustration, impatience, sense of panic, sense of being out of control … Can you really welcome all these nasty feelings that you’d prefer not to have at all?

Now check: are you these feelings? Or are you aware of these feelings? (think of the pen that you are holding in your hand. Are you the pen or are you aware of the pen?)

Could you let it all go? (realise that the pen is not attached to you – you could actually just drop it if you decided to)

Would you let it all go, too? (would you rather hold on to all these feelings or would you rather drop them?) (would you drop the pen from your hand?)

When?

Could you allow yourself to think of everything that is going well? The [g.e. beautiful city you live in], the [g.e. lovely puppy you have], the healthy food you can eat, in short: can you shift your attention from LACK to ABUNDANCE? Can you direct your focus from ‘missing/not yet having’ to ‘achievement/ already having’? Could you do this every time you realise that you are having thoughts about everything that’s missing? Be firm with your mind. Treat your mind like you train [g.e. your puppy]: train your mind to NOT go there where it sees lack and failure. Train your mind to go there where it sees abundance and success. Each time re-direct your attention to the ‘sunny side of the road’. You have a choice: on which side of the road would you rather walk? In the shade or in the sun?

Now your mind will say that this is all just talk and that without [g.e. a job, a lover, etc.] you can’t even begin to do this mind-training. That is what the mind does, and it is a perfect example of what I mean that you need to steer away from. Your happiness doesn’t depend on having or not having that new [g.e. job, lover, etc.]. Not in this specific moment. In THIS moment: WHAT is lacking? Look around you. Feel. Hear. Sense. Open up to the Now. Welcome everything that is presenting itself in this very specific present moment. ‘The present moment is a gift. That’s why we call it the present.’ Remember?

Your mind likes to fill up the Now with thoughts about the past and the future. Stop it. Be here, now. Give yourself a break. Allow yourself to feel that you are perfect, whole and complete in this very moment, exactly as you are, now. The solutions that your mind is after, will come. They will come much easier if you feel that even without these solutions you are already whole and perfect.

Finally, a last exercise:

If you don’t go into memory, can you find the ‘me’ that is having an issue?

Give yourself enough time to let this sink in.

If you don’t go into memory, can you find the ‘me’ that is having an issue?

In other words: in this very moment, what is actually here?

There’s [g.e. your puppy], there’s the place where you are, there’s the weather, certain sounds, sensations like warm or cold, comfortable or uncomfortable – your body is here, and it senses various things. That is really all there is. Can you feel the space in this moment? Can you hear the silence around the sounds? Can you notice the space around the things?

Dear [your name], this is all you need to do for now: practise being in the Now! Use your smart mind to take note of what is actually here, now. Redirect it, time and time again, from past and future worries, to present abundance and presence. Become Presence. Be the presence of awareness. Rest in that beingness. Enjoy simply being. Allow yourself to sense gratitude for being alive, in this present moment. Surrender. Be.

Tomorrow may never come. Yesterday has long gone. All you have is Now. Enjoy it. Live it. Thank it. You are beautiful, bright, healthy, you have love, friends, a place to live, … – you have so much to be grateful for! Focus on that, celebrate all that! And all the rest will be taken care of.

All the very best, with many loving regards,

Miriam Aziz

PS: Some practical tips:

  1. Have you made your vision boards? Surround yourself with pictures and words that represent your ideal situation. When you have done that, in joy and with fun, you let go of every worry about how to get it. The ‘how’ will be taken care of. Trust in that. You know where you want to be, while being totally okay with where you are. The whole ‘how’ you get from here to there, can surprise you. Allow it to surprise you. Can you let go of wanting to control the how?
  2. Find a meditation group and learn how to meditate. Meditating for 15 minutes a day can change your life.

 

PPS: Some literature you could dive into: ‘The Power of Now’, Eckhart Tolle. ‘The Art of Allowance’, Abraham-Hicks. ‘The Sedona Method’, Hale Dwoskin. ‘The Diamond in your Pocket’, Gangaji.

This email was written to a client who was beginning to feel quite desperate – this person felt it was taking too long and it was getting too hard to find a job. A couple of weeks later I received news that this person had found the perfect job in the perfect city, above expectation and better than this person had dared dreaming of! These ‘miracles’ happen to most of my clients, shortly after they have completely surrendered to the present moment, and everything in it.

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